Practicing His Presence

I often think of Robert Frost's Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening as I trek out to the barn in the winter. I want to write my own poem about it, but as yet, have not. Snow does something to me. I find it to be quite indescribable, really. The hush that comes over the land when the snow is falling thick and soft is a balm. Then there is the dark, and the quiet is quieter still. I want to go there, wherever it is we are getting this taste of, when the snow is falling at night. It draws me, this place. It soothes me. It is a place of retreat. It is nothingness and everything. I don't want to just stop, I want to STAY.  I feel peace and soaring in my spirit all at the same time, and I'm not even sure how that can be. But I know it is God and for whatever reason He has chosen this as a gift to me. Through this peace, this tranquility, this joy, He is speaking to me. He is telling me BE THIS. Be peace and calm and beauty and delight to the ones I have given you. I cry because I know I don't always the way that I should, and of course I can't at all without Him. I am so thankful for this snow which is always there, falling gently, reminding me, compelling me. So I press on with the practicing of His presence. So that in the midst of pbj's, spilled fish food, and lost library books, I can be who He wants me to be. Stopping by the woods on a snowy evening and it's falling around me, this presence, as I pick up wet towels and match socks and knead bread. "When the ones I have in my care are hurt or mad or dawdling or forgetful, help me Lord to feel you and be in your presence. And help me to teach THEM to stop by the woods and  practice your presence by showing." 

Study To Show Thyself Approved

      Well, I've been wondering what the Lord would have me write next. I want to write by His inspiration and not my own. I could write something every day with no problem. I have lots to say and sometimes very strong opinions about it as well!
      My husband and I have been watching a BBC documentary called Auschwitz: The Nazis and the Final Solution . It is gut wrenching, to say the very least. I can't even begin to describe the emotions I've felt, trying to digest the horror, the madness, the cruelty. It is just beyond my comprehension how the whole thing even happened; how things escalated to the degree that they did. It's scary to think how one man and his hatred can influence so many to evil. As I sit there with my hand sometimes over my mouth, trying to take it in, I pray. Pray we will never see another Holocaust like that one again.
      So this story has been bouncing around in my mind, the images playing over in my sleep at times. What has all this to do with the now? I'm not sure, but I feel it is somehow related to another thought that struck me today. It started with a spelling test. "Fifty, I don't like being fifty.I wish I were thirty. Fifty." "Mommmm." Next word- "Missed. Not mist like from the water, like miss but past tense. Like I miss being thirty. Missed." "Mommmm."
        We use Spelling Power. The theory behind the method is you test-study-test. With most spelling curriculum you study-test-study. Study a list for a week, take a test at the end and if you miss some of  them you study them again. With test-study-test you only study what you don't know. You do this daily. You restudy and retest the next day. Then when you know the word, you're done with it. You'll get it again later in review just to be sure. There is a method to the studying. Things you do to help cement the word into your memory. You read it. You write it. You close your eyes. Meditate on it. You look for something in the word that makes it stand out. You trace it with your fingers in something that you can feel, like salt. You check it off as you go. Make sure you are memorizing it. Making it stick.
      I've been trying to decide if I should stick with this method. The girls get frustrated when they miss a word. I tell them it's okay, you've never had this one before. Usually it's only a couple of words and in one or two times of retest, they get it.
       So it is with our walk. We are tested. Hopefully we study what we miss. "Study to show thyself approved." Then the next time the test comes we get that one. We may have a little review down the road, but we hardly even notice. We have that one. It's in there. Sometimes the realization hits me; I've had this one too many times. Why don't I get it? And I know, it's in the studying. Or the lack of really. I miss some of the steps in getting that Word in there so that when the test comes, I can show myself approved.
      Don't get me wrong. I think there are definitely things in life that come our way that have not so much to do with our ability to handle it or respond correctly or not. It's not always just about us. Sometimes it's about others and how God wants to use what we are going through or have been through to minister to someone else.And that's the showing thyself approved also. The being beside the other. Either way, we must study those things we don't know so well. Those things we trip over and forget. And review the things that we do know. Ingrain them.
      So it kind of seems to me that it is in the learning and loving of the words (Word) that we take them to heart. We become familiar. We know it. We embrace it, it becomes as part of us and it's there for us when we need it to handle whatever situation. We draw from it like a well, that knowledge of the Word.
     Have we learned from our tests? Have we studied since the events of times past? Praying we have............ 

    Well, I've finally done it! It's been on my heart to start a blog for a while now. I am a writer. I can never seem to convey what is in my mind or heart with words. I need pen and paper, or keyboard:) I pondered my reason for starting a blog, what name I would use, and about what subjects I would write. I've been doing a lot of soul searching. God, knowing my need, has led me to some great articles and resources which I hope to share. I know I am not alone. It can be a struggle to live life to the fullest. We can become bogged down by the mundane, the routine, the never ending-ness of dishes, laundry and cleaning. The feeling of not having accomplished all we need or want to get done in a day or a week or even a year can be discouraging.The demands of meeting everyone's needs sometimes results in neglecting or even forgetting about our own. Instead of pressing in to Him and His word and His life giving presence, we falter.
    So I speak more to myself than anyone else as I title my blog. It's an admonishment and encouragement to have "joy in the journey"; to see the Beautiful, the Wild, and the Wonderful in this life that we live; to enjoy Him and truly see the ways He reveals Himself to us.
    Here is a link to the e-magazine Impart with a great article entitled I'm On A Quest to Get My Groove Back by Michele Vanmatre. When I read it I felt as if I could have written it myself. Enjoy! www.impartmagazine.com